Romesco (1 tablespoon / serving)

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Nutritional Info
  • Servings Per Recipe: 24
  • Amount Per Serving
  • Calories: 22.7
  • Total Fat: 2.0 g
  • Cholesterol: 0.0 mg
  • Sodium: 8.4 mg
  • Total Carbs: 1.0 g
  • Dietary Fiber: 0.1 g
  • Protein: 0.4 g

View full nutritional breakdown of Romesco (1 tablespoon / serving) calories by ingredient
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Number of Servings: 24


    Romesco sauce!
    Whereas, the hour of the Mayonnaise is fading, fading, falling into oblivion and caloritude and large jars at cheap deli counters, wailing in its sorrow and oiliness;

    Whereas, the Mustard is as a ptarmigan lost and crying in the streets of Indianapolis, and full of woe therefrom;

    Whereas, the prophecied Remoulade, surrounded by the angels of gherkins and scallions and beansprouts and fennel and charming sausages, has not arrived;

    By the authority vested in me by the Great Colander of Coland,

    I hereby proclaim 2012 to be the Year of Romesco Sauce! The sauce that is sweet and sour, salty and spicy, aromatic and astronomical, and not ridiculous high in calories!

    First must be constructed The Raosted Red Pepper. (Beware! If it were roasted rather than raosted, Western Civilization as we know it would be in peril!) Acquire one red bell pepper. Slice it in half through the clapper with a violent and perilous knife, being careful not to cut Western Civilization in half at the same time. Using forceps and tractor-beams, place it under a brioler (not a broiler!) for a few minutes, until the skin is blistered. (Use of mustard gas or other vesicants instead is not recommended.) Let it cool, and flay the burnt skin from the flesh, following the style of that master-flenser and supreme torturer Bobby Flay.

    Then must be constructed The Roasted Garlic. Depaper several cloves of garlic -- no! no! More garlic than that! -- and slice it rudely into pieces the size of peices. Drown it in olive oil in a crucible, and place it into the oven and let it cook and roast for several minutes, until it has become Roasted Garlic.

    Then -- the hurling! Into a food processor the size of a vegetable, hurl the pepper, the garlic and its oil, and the other ingredients! These must include:

    A tablespoon or two of almond butter!
    The vinegar -- a vinegar of balsam, or of red whining, or, if you must, of sidereal cider. A teaspoon or two! To taste!
    A teaspoon of sesame oil! The orientalistic sort!
    A teaspoon of fine Spanish fine smoked fine paprika fine!
    A teaspoon of chili-garlic rooster sauce!
    A slice of the whitest white bread, so white that it receives invitations to join the Republican party, with the crusts removed!
    Salt to taste.
    Taste to salt.
    Salt taste too.
    Taste salt too!
    Two salt tastes
    Two taste salts.
    A dash of aji-no-moto if you are not afraid of it
    A tablespoon of tomato paste
    Anything else you feel inclined to add.
    Within the sacred confines of the food processer, let these ingredients be fooped unto a foopish foopedness! Taste them therewith, and correct the flavoring, so that it tastes like the Romesco Sauce of your desiring, or at least, more Romescan than anything served in the famed Forbidden Island Tiki Lounge.

    Then let this Sauce Romesco be served forth with steamed or zapped or raw vegetables, which are known as "crudites" by the crude, or with meat, or with fish, or with pizza, or with white chocolate ice cream, or with meatballs and pineapple sorbet New York style pizza from DiGiorno's, or even in a bowl by itself on the side of the counter and forgotten until after dinner.

    This is my firstmost and most first proclamation of 2012! Pray that I do not proclaim further!


Serving Size: 24 servings of one tablespoon each

Number of Servings: 24

Recipe submitted by SparkPeople user BARDBL.

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Member Ratings For This Recipe

  • Can I be trusted to make a viand upon which hangeth the fate of Western Civilization? - 10/29/12

    Was this review helpful?   yes  No
  • Best. Recipe. Ever. (And I havent even made it yet.) Seriously, giving this 5 stars based only on writing style. I will revise after I taste it. - 10/22/12

    Was this review helpful?   yes  No
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